Gravy Burgers – Junk Food Post #7

One week…seven recipes…boo yeah!  Hopefully the first week of unResolution month has been “full filling” for you and that I am making you as hungry as I am making me.  Speaking of me, today’s recipe is near and dear to my heart … insofar as it tried to clog it up with lots of grease and butter and yummy mayonnaise … because the following meal is what I ate after I the last final of my last semester of college.  It was:

Jumbo Hamburgers with Mayonnaise, Ketchup, Gravy, French Fries, and Grilled Buns with Butter and Beer on the Side

I went to a place called J.B. Stout’s after that final not really looking to eat poorly.  Rather, I was in search of beer.  However, J.B. Stout’s was semi-famous because they sold “Stout burgers” which were these unimaginably huge hamburgers which I had never ordered.  Even though I was not veg at the time, I was not a huge eater of red meat.

And while I had considered trying to consume the awesomeness of the Stout burger, I never could convince myself to order one.  However, on that day so many years ago, I was consumed with a giddy feeling  of possibility and rebellion!  I was done with school and what better way to celebrate than eating a metric ton of grease?!

The best part about all of this, though, is that it just started out as a thick hamburger with heavily buttered buns to which I added a “celebration sized” glob of ketchup.  But I was also drinking beer and I had a buddy there…

So next came the mayonnaise which was put on the bun and the fries.  But that wasn’t good enough.  Then I needed gravy to dip the fries into (thanks Swiss Chalet!) and then I needed more beer to keep my blood thin enough to avoid a severe coronary.  Sometimes I think I ordered onion rings, too, but I can’t be sure.

It was a great day, a memorable meal, and I’m sure it will become a classic in your household (if by classi,c I mean a meal you’ll eat it once and ALWAYS wonder why…)

Oh, and to make things better for my vegan eaters, this recipe is written as all vegan.  The key will be finding a good, greasy vegan gravy to go on top.  Bon appetite!

Jumbo Hamburgers aka Gravy Burgers

So obviously the original burgers weren’t vegan, but you should still give a burger made from Match Foods a try!

You will need:

  • 1 package Match hamburger (enough for 2 burgers)
  • 1/2 small onion, minced
  • 1 tablespoon garlic powder
  • 4 tablespoons vegan margarine or butter (divided)
  • 2 hamburger buns
  • 6-8 DEEP FRIED french fries (this is unResolution month)
  • Ketchup to taste
  • Gravy to taste
  • 4 tablespoons vegenaise
  • (optional) 8 strips of vegan bacon fried in 2 tablespoons of olive oil or real bacon cooked.
  • French fries to serve along side
  • 1 or more good wheat beers

Thaw (aka defreeze) the Match meat and mix in a bowl with the onions and garlic powder.  Form into two giant patties.  Top with salt and pepper.

In a skillet, melt two tablespoons of vegan margarine.  Once melted, add the burgers.  Cook for 3-4 minutes per side and then flip.  Cook an additional 3-4 minutes.

Once the burgers are done, spread the vegan margarine on both sides of the bun and cook them butter side down until the bread starts to brown.

Assembling the Monster Burger

Lay out the buns and put the burger on one side.  Top with french fries, ketchup, and gravy.  Spread the vegenaise on the other half of the bun.  Optionally top with the bacon for that added kick.

Serve with a side of more fries, ketchup, veganaise, and gravy and the beer.  And most importantly, enjoy!

Notes:

  1. I am not the world’s biggest fan of veganaise in its raw, unprocessed form.  If you have some of it at home, feel free to kick it up with a little vegan sugar and a little lemon juice.  Also, feel free to make your own crazy mayos by adding hot sauce, garlic, ketchup or whatever you like!

7 Comments

  1. Hi Chris!

    Really a monster burger only for 1 person? Tough, but to dig in!
    It remembers the chivito towers we’ve here, similar instead of burger is a thin beef steak 😉

    Gera .:. sweetsfoods

  2. The only thing comparable to that burger is the Big Boy Omlette my sports editor dared me to eat.
    Picture this huge log roll filled with eggs, bacon, ham, pork, onions.
    The table shook when they sat it in front of us. The saturated fat glistened in the afternoon light.
    I almost wished for defibrillator paddles to be ready just in case.
    And my sports editor at the time: He put his down with a big cup of country gravy.

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